fund sarcasm


October 2018
« Nov    


• 2013 Majors

BCAPL National 8-Ball Championships
Rio All-Suite Las Vegas Hotel and Casino
Las Vegas, NV
first time at the Rio (adios Riviera) and things get epic
Hard Times 10-Ball Open
Hard Times Billiards
Bellflower, CA
just a lil pre-Vegas warm up tournament
West Coast Challenge
$4,000 added One Pocket
$10,000 added 10-Ball
California Billiard Club
Mountain View, CA
last event at this location before they close (sadface)
Cole Dickson Memorial 9-Ball
Family Billiards
San Francisco, CA
for legendary road player Cole Dickson
Pots 'N' Pans Memorial 9-Ball
Pool Sharks
Las Vegas, NV
celebrating hustler Bernard Rogoff, better known as "Pots 'N' Pans"
TAR35 | Dennis Orcollo vs Shane Van Boening
TAR Studio
Las Vegas, NV
second and third days
TAR33 | Francisco Bustamante vs Alex Pagulayan
TAR Studio
Las Vegas, NV
second (1P) and part of third (10B) day
TAR32 | Ronnie Alcano vs Jayson Shaw
TAR Studio
Las Vegas, NV
GREAT match • Andy Mercer Memorial 9-Ball Tournament coverage
Chet Itow Memorial 9-Ball
California Billiards Club
Mountain View, CA
drank too much to do good coverage, but here it is, anyway
Jay Swanson Memorial 9-Ball
Hard Times Billiards
Bellflower, CA
let Robocop show you how to run a six-pack, Citizen
TAR31 | Mike Dechaine vs Shane Van Boening
TAR Studio
Las Vegas, NV
TAR30 | Darren Appleton vs Shane Van Boening
TAR Studio
Las Vegas, NV
the boys are back in town
» Huidji See
» Donny Mills
the best kind of New Year's Sandwich
that's not okay
you know that I'm no good
on being a reasonable human being with realistic expectations
instasham series
stories from the distant and slightly-less-distant past
the only people for me are the mad ones
questions, tournaments, bets, running 26.2 miles


The Action Report
purveyor of fine challenge matches between highly-skilled players of note
Cue Times Billiard News
Colorado's best resource for all things pool-related
Jack Justis Cases
the choice of champions
Sugartree Customs
made by Eric "Slower Than Snails" Crisp, if and when he feels like it
Tucker Cue Works
"If you feel the need to ask me how your cue is progressing every week then maybe there is a better choice of cuemakers out there for you."
Kurzweils' Country Meats
yes, meat

still procrastinEGGing


reading links
all links open in a new window

Reading Links this week will include links to Halloween-ish Wikipedia articles.

« T A L L »
Could Neuroscience Exonerate Showtime Serial Killer Dexter Morgan?
But let’s say the law somehow—horribly, unthinkably—caught up with Dexter… What would happen then?
« G R A N D E »
Armstrong’s Fortune Likely to Withstand Doping Charges
[H]e is still a rich man, with an estimated net worth of $125 million.



« H A L L O W E E N ! »
CREEPY! Dyatlov Pass
Soviet investigators determined only that “a compelling unknown force” had caused the deaths.
WEIRD! Bloop
Fox’s hunch is that the sound nicknamed Bloop is the most likely to come from some sort of animal, because its signature is a rapid variation in frequency similar to that of sounds known to be made by marine beasts.



let‘s get crackin’

A box without hinges key or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid.

Eggs are great. They’re prepackaged in convenient serving sizes, available everywhere, nutritious, and highly affordable for a hack like me. I was tasked one day to find a good egg salad recipe. Okay. No Big Deal. I got this, it’s a flippin’ salad fer chrissakes…

…except I found out egg salad required boiled eggs and I, uh, didn’t know how to boil them. Heh. Heh. Heeeeh. Dammit.


I thought about the boiled eggs of my childhood and realized I really, really hated them. They were invariably tough, with super-dried out powdery yolks rimmed in that nasty green tint. Yuck. This vast distate for crap-boiled eggs is what led to my overwhelming preference for fried and poached eggs. The abhorrent dryness stems from — and I never knew this was even a possibility with eggs — overcooking.


egg salad

After much research, I found an effective method of boiling eggs. Then, I was ready to try out an egg salad recipe I had stumbled on many months ago while looking for Random Crap on the Internet. The recipe was by David Lebovitz, a well-known pastry chef. I imagine the elite levels of cookery must be similar to the elite levels of pool — that is, you can specialize in one game or field and still kick most peoples’ asses in games you’re not as good at. Top pastry chef must still be damn good at making egg salad.

Here it is — the incredible, edible egg. I use 4 eggs for my take on this recipe, but you can easily multiply ingredients for larger servings.
It’s best to use week-old eggs for boiling as fresh eggs are really hard to peel.
Place the eggs in a pot and cold water, making sure there is at least an inch of water above them.
When the water comes to a rolling boil, take the pot off the heat and set it aside. The heat of the water will continue cooking the eggs. How done you want the eggs depends on how long you leave them in there.

For the just-hard eggs I am using in this recipe, I find that anywhere between 17-19 minutes is good. If the eggs were room temperature when I started cooking, they sit for 17 minutes. If they were refrigerator-temperature, 19 minutes.


While the eggs are sitting around in their hot tub, prep your seasonings and additives.

Clock wise from the bottom center they are: ground red and black pepper, sunflower seeds, Dijon mustard (I like to mix in some whole-gran Dijon sometimes) and mayonnaise, capers and some caper juice. You could probably substitute the capers with finely diced dill pickles if capers are not your thing.


Ding! The timer goes off and the eggs are done. Now, we must stop them from cooking.

Pour off the hot water and cover the eggs with cold water and/or ice.

I speed things up by adding ice packets. You can use ice cubes — I don’t have an icemaker so all my ice cubes are laboriously cut by hand from glaciers. The ice packets make things much easier. They’re also great for cooling things down you don’t want diluted with water like brine and soup. Plus, they fit perfect in my lunchbox.


Once the eggs are cool enough to handle, you may commence peeling. It is sometimes easier to peel the eggs underwater. After peeling, I cut the eggs in half and pop the egg yolks into the mixing bowl.

Then I chop the whites. It’s neater that way. You’re going to mash most of the yolks, so there is little point in chopping them on your chopping board and getting things all yolkified.
Add the capers and their juice, the mayonnaise, and dijon mustard until it is how you like it. Always start out with less — it’s easy to add and near impossible to take away.
Fold gently with a small spatula, spoon, or fork. Break up the yolks into the size you like. I tend to dice things up on the smaller side because I find it easier to eat.
Add the seasonings and fold gently with a spatula.
As always, add however much you like to your taste. I added a mixture of ancho chili and chipotle for a nice smoky slightly spicy taste (they’re not hot at all). I also added black pepper. You can use all black pepper, all red pepper, or a mix of both. Smoked or sweet paprika is also a nice option.
Mix in the sunflower seeds. They add a nice bit of texture and flavor, and taste even better when the salad has had some time to sit and marinate.
I season to taste with sea salt, which is not as strong as table salt and does not have the metallic iodine taste. The finer crystals also ensure more even distribution.
I use 1/8 to 1/4 of a teaspoon of salt.

After everything is properly mixed, it’s time to eat your masterpiece. Below are a few ways on how to eat egg salad.


You could hollow out cherry or cocktail tomato halves and then fill them with a small spoonful of salad.

You can use larger tomato halves as well. Small ones make for great bite-size appetizers.


You could make an egg salad sandwich for you (and a friend). Lightly toast your bread before assembling. Line your bread with your choice of greens. I suggest using arugula or watercress to line your bread. The peppery taste of these greens really goes well with the salad, but you can use whatever lettuces or greens you have on hand as well. Make sure the greens are washed and thoroughly dried.

for me?! awww!

Put a healthy dollop of salad on the greens. It’s okay if you put too much and it spills out the side — that’s how egg salad sandwiches work. I like a slice of tomato on mine, too. If you also like tomato on your sandwich, put it on there now but be sure to eat the sandwich promptly as the moisture from the tomato will make the salad runny over time. Top with more greens and then the other slice of bread.


Or, you could just eat it out of the bowl with a spoon.

Cuz it’s plenty tasty like that. 🙂

People will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold — but so does a hard-boiled egg.



ingredients list

My adaptation serves one comfortably, or two adequately. Adjust seasonings and ingredients to your taste. Find the original recipe here (it uses 6 eggs and will feed more people).


egg salad adapted from David Lebovitz

  • 4 eggs
  • 1/4 cup mayonnaise or to taste
  • 1 teaspoon Dijon mustard or to taste
  • 1 tablespoon capers, chopped (I like lots of capers)
  • 1 teaspoon caper juice
  • 1 teaspoon ground red pepper (I like a half-half mix of ancho chili and chipotle)
  • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper or to taste
  • sea salt to taste



This recipe post for reader fly4lyf — congratulations!. 🙂

aww yeah

8 comments to still procrastinEGGing

  • Zack

    Yummm… I just made boiled eggs today. I do them the same way. It works out great… I like them a little less cooked in the center of the yolk, so I can time them accordingly. I made tuna/egg salad today with mustard. Simple, easy, quick, and delicious.

  • Gabe

    I’m leaving for Panama tomorrow morning and have 4 eggs, Dijon mustard, a can of tuna and half a red onion leftover. Looks like I’ll be improving some sort of egg salad too, thanks for the boiling tips!

    • Adhesive Remover

      I like that you have Dijon mustard while traveling through Central America. Very French of you. 😉

  • Rope_one

    I find the small pretzel sticks are an awesome compliment to any egg sandwich instead of lettuce for a new twist. Named birds nest sandwich.

    • Adhesive Remover

      Ooooh, that’s something I must try. I bet I could do some fun food sculpturing as well. 🙂

  • Ali

    THANK YOU!!! 🙂 <3 Love it!!